A Night in the Life of a Mommy
9:45 p.m. Crawl into bed with Maggie and read together (each of us reading our own books).
10:00 Lights out and snuggling with Maggie. We both fall asleep quickly.
11:30 Anna arrives to crawl into bed with me. (Maggie is in her own bed by now.)
12:00 While snuggling back to sleep, I start to worry that Anna’s breathing is a little irregular. She had a pretty bad bump on the head the evening before, and I remember reading the irregular breathing while sleeping is a sign of brain injury.
12:05 Panicked, I get up and turn the computer on, and visit AskDrSears.com (my go-to source for emergency health info). Yes, irregular breathing is a sign of brain injury, but he specifically says that it is shallow, irregular breathing that looks different from typical kid sleep breathing–not really what I’m seeing, at least I don’t think so. But he says if your mom alarms are going off, or if you’re worried, arouse your child. If they wake up and look or smile and you and snuggle back to sleep, and show no other signs of injury, roll over and go back to sleep–they’re fine.
12:10 a.m. I wake up Anna, standng her up and asking her how she’s feeling. She looks at me (pupils even) sleepily and asks me why I’m asking. And curls back into the pillows and goes back to sleep.
12:15 a.m. I wake up Steve, so that he can talk me down and reassure me that her head bonk wasn’t that bad. He does all that, but I’m not yet calm.
12:25 a.m. I crawl back into bed with Anna, turing on the lamp to read for a little while.
12:45 a.m. I go find my cell phone so I can set the alarm to wake me at 2-hour intervals to check on Anna. (Dr. Sears suggests this.)
1:00 a.m. I turn off the light and try to sleep. I periodically lay my hand on Anna’s breathing belly, and wonder if I’m right that her breathing is deep. Are the irregularities really just due to a little chest and nasal congestion? Did I feel a little twitching? Was it on both sides or just one?
1:15ish I finally fall asleep.
2:25 a.m. Anna wakes up to nurse, and though sleepy is alert and talktive. Normally not such a good sign in the middle of the night, but on this night it is reassuring and calming.
2:30 a.m. My alarm goes off, and I silence it.
3:00 a.m. Anna is still awake. She asks for a tissue, and proceeds to ineffectively blow her nose about 25 times.
4:00 a.m. Anna is still awake. Normally I would be a little out of my mind at this point, but my earlier worry has me rather enjoying this awake time together. We are snuggling and chatting a little. She’s still blowing her nose but not having much luck clearning her nasal passages. “Mommy,” she says, “Sometimes the snot just won’t come out.”
4:15 a.m. I turn off the 4:30 alarm.
4:20 a.m. Anna says, “Mommy, I need to pee. With you.” So we get up and go to the bathroom.
4:45 is We both finally sleep.
6:30 a.m. My d*mn alarm goes off. What was I thinking? I turn it off and Anna rolls over to nurse. She seems quite herself.
8:00 a.m. Anna wakes up so of course so do I. The sun is finally up, and that alone makes me feel better. As is often true for her, she wakes up full of things to say. “Mommy, ” she says, “I think I understand why they can’t use scripts on stage. [Maggie is currently in a play.] If they do that, it’s hard for them to seem like the characters.” And so forth.
Phew! I’m glad it’s morning!