My latest cookbook crush November 8, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Family Life, cooking.Tags: cook's illustrated, quick dinners
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I admit it. I tend to get crushes on cookbooks. Last summer it was Patricia Wells’ Vegetable Harvest. Newly obsessed with my own garden’s bounty and eating locally in generally, I literally ate up all her recipes for seasonal produce.
This fall? Things are a little different around here. While I’m still gardening and shopping at the market, my newish part-time job has made life significantly more crowded. So my new cookbook crush?
I’ve been a Cook’s Illustrated junkie for years now…I love the look and feel of the magazine, and the approach to testing recipes appeals to the scientist in me. So when I got an offer for a discounted copy of this book, I couldn’t resist. I rarely buy cookbooks, and when I do, it’s usually only after a long trial period with the library copy. But there was no copy of this in the library, so I just took the plunge.
So far, so good! The recipes really do take 30 minutes, and use tricks like cooking pasta in a sauce rather than separately. So in addition to quick cooking, the recipes tend to use minimal pots and pans–always a bonus. The only shortcoming for me is that the recipes often have an ingredient or two that I don’t generally have on hand, so advance planning is required. But being able to produce a real dinner on the fly definitely makes it worth it.
The hut-tent-car, or why we limit screen time. November 5, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Family Life, unschooling.Tags: radical unschooling, television, tv-free
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The other morning, both the kids were a little squirmy. Anna in particular. It was a cold and rainy day, and I had my hands full doing some household chores. Anna wanted to turn on the computer, but I said no, let’s look around for something else to do. She wanted me to tell her what do to, but vehemently rejected the few suggestions I made. She finally headed off to her room and I went back to filing the dishwasher.
Before long, I realized that there was a cold draft in the kitchen. I looked over and saw that the door to the screen porch was open. I looked out, and this is what I saw:
“Hi Mom,” said Maggie. “This is our hut-tent-car.”
“Yeah!” said Anna. “We made it OURSELVES!”
And they went back to what they were doing, absorbed in the details of their imaginary adventure.
This is a perfect illustration of why I have found it best to limit screen time around here. In some ways, a dreary Sunday morning seems like the perfect time to curl up with video. And on some days, it might be. But we’d had more than a little screen time the day before, and my instinct was that the computer would suck them in and set the tone for the day. And while I’m sure the girls would have enjoyed whatever game they played, I know from experience that it would not have brought them to that joyful, connected groove that I encountered on the porch.
We’ll never be a screen-free family. We enjoy our television and (obviously) our computers. But it’s never felt right to take the path of unlimited screen time, either. While the theory is that kids will learn to self-regulate, it’s been my experience that an excess of screen time is really detrimental to our family life overall.
But what constitutes an excess of screen time? Well, that question is certainly a work in progress around here. I sometimes long desperately for the clarity of folks on the ends of the spectrum–to determine that TV is bad and that their kids will have none of it, or that electronic media are just part of learning, and their kids can have as much as they want. We certainly have no hard and fast rules about number of hours or set times for computer use. In general, we try to stay away from computers and tv in the mornings, when they seems to have a knack for derailing our day. Mainly, I just try to follow my gut instinct on what we’re all needing at a particular time, and try to guide rather than dictate.
I certainly don’t have this all figured out. I know that I really want to help my kids learn how to move through that place of squirmy boredom. Electronic media can be so entirely compelling (at least for my kids) that it short-circuits that process. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said, “No, let’s not turn on the television now,” and then literally within minutes the girls are involved in some elaborate game. And if I’d said yes, that game would never have happened.
The kids are incredibly good at being in the moment and reaching for the joy at hand. Which is sometimes electronic in form. Hopefully, my role can be to keep an ear on the overall pulse of our family, to help our little choices add up to a bigger picture that feels balanced and whole.
Found a peanut. November 4, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Family Life, Gardening, Playing outside, unschooling.Tags: fall, peanuts
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My in-laws recently harvested a nice crop of peanuts. With some of their extra seeds, I had put in a few plants myself, but they have been entirely neglected. I put them in as more or less an afterthought, in what is honestly the worst bed in the garden. We got a few plants, but they were pretty overrun with weeds, and I didn’t figure they were producing much of anything. But after seeing the big basket of peanuts at Gramma’s today, it seemed worth at least taking a look to see if there was anything there.
And there was!
After I found the first one, I went inside and got the girls so that they could see. We managed to dig up a handful of peanuts. It’s fun–kind of like digging potatoes, it’s a treasure hunt. For more on peanuts and how they grow, check out this link .
The best part was that after harvesting our little legumes, they quickly started playing a game that involved living in Australia. Maggie was a wild kangaroo that was attacking the garden, and Anna was scaring her off by tossing radish greens in her hair. Meanwhile, I cleared out a bed in anticipation of planting garlic and shallots to the happy music of their play. All in the midst of a gorgeous fall day. It doesn’t get much better than this.
Letting Go November 3, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Uncategorized.Tags: frogging, knitting, yarn stash
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Now, you might think that this post is about letting go of my kids as they grow, or letting go of my control over their learning.
It’s not.
This post is about knitting.
SouleMama recently posted about ripping back a sweater that was almost finished but wasn’t really turning out the way she liked. It reminded me that I had a few knitting projects in the “retired” basket that really needed some tending to.
So I said goodbye to a number of projects-in-process…
Emma’s Unmentionables–much as I love this pattern, I think this kind of garment is more the kind of thing I would sew rather than knit. I just didn’t enjoy working on it that much, and by the time I finished it I don’t think it would have fit either of my girls. So goodbye bloomers, hello many skeins of lovely green Cascade Sierra. Any ideas what I should do with it?
Bristow-Okay, let’s face it–this sweater was kind of a fantasy. I still have hopes of knitting a sweater for myself, but a fancy cabled sweater knit on size 5 needles is pretty much of a non-starter. It’s nice, though, that I now have a sweater’s worth of worsted weight yarn (gorgeous Black Water Abbey worsted in Ocean) waiting for me when I finally do have the time and concentration to take on a mama-sized sweater.
The Jane Austen Dress: I have been attracted more than once to dresses with knitted bodices and sewn skirts. A nice quick project, right? I saw this one on SouleMama, and was charmed. I got the yarn, cast it on, and started knitting. But for some reason, the simple lace pattern entirely befuddled me. I kept messing up the stitch count. After ripping back three or four times, I decided that this was not the patern for me, no matter how sweet it is. Yesterday, it finally came off the needles. I’ve saved the yarn, perhaps for a simpler dress bodice. But maybe not. I think I just don’t like knitting with cotton that much!
It feels surprisingly great to rip up the knitting and put it to rest. All of these projects had been languishing for at least many months, or even more than a year. Time to let go and move on! I wound the balls, put the yarn back in my stash, and was able with equanimity to return to my two current projects on the needles. No unfinished projects crowding my mind or my knitting basket.
Aaaaahhhhh.
A trio in blue. November 2, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Art/Crafts, knitting.Tags: knitting, lillie's little sweater, owlet, toasty topper
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(Yes, that is the edge of my pajamas in the upper corner of the photograph.)
These three knits are gifts for dear friends who are soon to be welcoming a new member to their family. The seeds for this project were planted a loonng time ago, when my friend Jennifer mentioned that if ever I was going to knit something for her daughter, she would love a hat with a scarf attached, since she had fond memories of one from her own childhood. Not long after that, I came across Knitty’s Toasty Topper, and put that in my mental queue. So when I found out that Jennifer was expecting a new baby, I thought it would make a good big sister gift, bought the yarn, and knit it this summer while we were in New York (always a time of super-productive knitting). And then, having just knit Owlet (scroll down) for my nephew, I was inspired to make a hat for the big brother using those fantastic owl cables.
The girls enjoyed modeling the hats.
And then I moved on to baby knitting…I went to the (only) local yarn shop in search of inspiration, and found it: a sample of Lillie’s Little Sweater, a top down hooded cardigan knit (hooray!) in one piece. Although the shop owner thought I was crazy not to just do a baby sweater in acrylic (sorry, but ick!), I went home with the pattern and some lovely blue Misti Alpaca.
Although blue might not be the usual choice for a baby of as-yet-unknown gender, it seemed perfect to me. I love blue for baby girls, and it is almost impossible to find–seems like everything blue also has trucks or construction equipment or something that says, “I’m a boy!” I loved the few pieces of blue clothing that my girls had as babies, so I’m always happy when I can gift a girl with something blue. And if it turns out to be a boy–well, obviously blue works just fine. Although I will admit to sewing the buttons on the “girl” side even though the baby hasn’t made his/her gender known yet. Somehow, I don’t think anyone will notice.
I have to admit that this sweater was a more ambitious knitting project than I had intended. I’ve been trying to stick to accessories and quick knits that I can actually complete. But my New York knitting groove got the best of me, and I figured that SURELY I could whip out the sweater in time for the new baby.
Which I have, but just barely. Jennifer, who has always delivered early, is now 38 weeks–and the sweater is ready to go. I have been dilligently knitting away on this sweater since we returned from New York in August, but progress has been slow. I have been disciplined about only knitting on this one project, but when I only seem to get a row or two done at a time, the little sweater grew very slowly. But grow it did, and now it’s finished, ready to cradle that sweet little head when it arrives.
I wouldn’t gift just anyone with a hand-knit alpaca sweater, but I’m so happy to give this to Jennifer. Although not a knitter herself, she appreciates the love and care that goes into such a gift–and she isn’t afraid of a natural fiber! (Although I did buy a small bottle of Euclan to include with the knits.) I also know she will hand this down first to her own babies and then to others who will enjoy this little bit of knitted goodness. I love imagining this little sweater getting passed around from one family to the next, wrapping new little babies in coziness and love.
In the meantime, getting that project finished has given me a spurt of new knitting momentum. More to come on that….
A surprise from the garden. November 1, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Gardening, Recipes, cooking.Tags: corn chowder, dairy-free, gluten-free
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I have to admit that the garden has been somewhat neglected lately. Although I did manage to get a little fall planting done, I still have clean-out to do from the summer. My garlic and shallots arrived a few weeks ago, but I haven’t managed to get them into the ground.
But things have kept growing. The peppers are still producing a little, as are the black-eyed peas. And I noticed a while ago that we seemed to have some volunteer potatoes. I guess when we harvested them back in August, we missed a few–and they started to grow again. I wasn’t sure if there were any edible parts underground, but it seemed worth a grabble or two.
And look what I found!
Okay, not the most beautiful potatoes in the world. But definitely soup-worthy. And since yesterday dawned wet, cold, and rainy, soup seemed just the thing.
I settled on our favorite corn chowder, adapted from the somewhat-dated-but-well-loved “The New Basics Cookbook” by Rosso and Lukins (remember the Silver Palate?). My mom gave me that cookbook in 1989, when I was a college senior and living on my own for the first time. Anyway, the chowder recipe in there was the starting point, but this is our version. We started using coconut milk in the days when Anna and I were off dairy, but kept using it because it tastes so good. But you could certainly go back to using cow’s milk if you prefer. As a bonus, I took out the flour so it would also be gluten-free.
Our Favorite Corn Chowder
- 8 oz. bacon, chopped
- 4 cups chopped onions
- 2 T. cornstarch
- 2 quarts chicken stock
- 4-6 cups diced potatoes (1/4″)
- 1 can coconut milk
- 3 bags of frozen corn (16 oz. each)
- Salt and pepper to taste
- 2 large red bell peppers, diced (1/4″)
- 1 bunch scallions, sliced
- 1/4 cup chopped cilantro
Saute the bacon in a large stockpot until the fat has rendered, about 5 minutes. Add the onions and saute until soft, about 10 minutes. Add the cornstarch and about 1 cup of the stock, scraping the bottom. Simmer for about 5 minutes. Add the remaining stock, potatoes, and salt to taste. (I use 1-1/2 tablespoons to start, but my stock is unseasoned/unsalted. Adjust accordingly.) Simmer until potatoes are tender, 10-15 minutes. Add the pepper, corn, half and half, bell pepper, and scallions. Simmer for about 5 minutes, until all are heated through. Stir in cilantro and serve.
This soup freezes well, though we rarely have any left over that long!
Every fairy needs her dagger. October 31, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Uncategorized.2 comments
The girls have so far enjoyed having coordinating costumes (last year it was a spider queen and her web), and this year settled on Tinkerbell and Peter Pan. And in case you were wondering, this is Tinkerbell dressed up for a fairy dance, which is why she is wearing pink instead of green.
My kids–especially Anna, but both of them really–are big fans of the Disney fairies. I admit that I was reflexively resistant to this line of uber-marketed Barbie-ish creatures. But I’ve softened. First of all, we read the first two Disney fairy books (“Fairy Dust and the Quest for the Egg” and “Fairy Haven and the Quest for the Wand”), which are actually two very nice books written by Gail Carson Levine. She spins tales of Neverland fairies with different talents, creating a detailed fantasy world that has totally captured the girls’ imaginations. There are then dozens of shorter books about individual fairies; we’ve read many of them, and they are a favorite of Anna when she’s looking for an audiobook. I still wish that the illustrations didn’t have them looking like friendly Bratz dolls, but I can live with that.
So, Tinkerbell and Peter it was. Maggie has been really inspired by the Peter Pan musical of late, so she was excited to dress up as Peter Pan. Anna–of course–wanted to be a fairy, and loved the idea of complementing Maggie’s Peter. So I gathered patterns and fabrics, sewed and altered and assembled. I was pleased that well ahead of Halloween, I had the costumes finished.
Or so I thought.
“Oh, Mommy, my costume is soooo beautiful. Everyone will love it!” Anna gushed. “But there’s one thing–I need a place to put my dagger.”
“Your dagger?” I asked.
“Yes, of course,” she answered. “Tinkerbell always carries a dagger.”
“Really?” I asked dubiously. I turned to Maggie, seeking some back-up.
“Of course, she does, Mom,” said Maggie (being no help at all). “Tinkerbell is very fierce.”
So, we borrowed a dagger and decorated it with jewels. And my fierce little fairy headed out in miles of tulle and satin–carrying a sharp weapon. Sounds just about perfect.
Thankful Anyway Thursday October 30, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Family Life, attachment parenting.Tags: co-sleeping, sleep, vilma mcclure
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Yes, it’s Friday. Which is appropriate given the couple of weeks I’ve had. Actually, I tried to post this last week but didn’t make it. Lots of not making it around here lately. Well, not making it on time, anyway.
Early last week, I noticed that I was feeling much more fragile than usual. Fairly minor frustrations were reducing me to tears. And most noticeable, it seemed impossible to keep up with much of anything. I would wake up in the morning with a modest mental list of things I wanted to accomplish, but by the end of the day I had managed to do exactly none of them.
And then I realized. I haven’t been sleeping! Well, not with any regularity.
Now, this is hardly a revelation–Anna has never been much of a nighttime sleeper, even as she approaches her fifth birthday. But over the past few months, things gradually started to improve. As often as not, I would be awakened at 6 or 7 in the morning by Anna crawling into bed with me after having slept through the night. Or she would crawl in with me in the middle of the night, snuggle up against me, and go back to sleep until morning.
So the fog began to lift. I was actually able to get through the day without resorting to caffeine or an emergency nap. My brain felt a little sharper and I was more capable of getting things done both for myself and for the kids. And while I wouldn’t describe myself as either super-productive or well-rested, the tide turned.
And then, just as gradually, it turned back. Anna started waking earlier, and more frequently. We’ve had lots of nights where she is literally restless for hours, climbing on me (or, thankfully, her dad) but not able to resettle. And before I even realized it, I was back in sleep-deprived survival mode.
I’m tired and often short-tempered. I am having a hard time accomplishing what I need to do. I am not being the mother, friend, or employee that I would like to be.
But I’m thankful anyway.
I’m thankful to be part of a community where responsive nighttime parenting is the norm, so I can get compassionate and appreciative support for the challenges of my little waker.
I’m thankful that Anna is growing and learning and her little brain is full of so much stimulation that she just can’t slow it down, even to sleep.
I’m thankful that I have a kind and supportive partner who always has my back.
I’m thankful for those moments when I have the self-possession to surrender to our time in the wee hours rather than resenting it.
But most of all, I’m thankful for Anna. For passionate, high-tempered, exuberant Anna. For the way she crawls into bed with me, curls into my arms, and sighs, “Mama….” like she is in the best and happiest spot in the world. It is so clear to me that these particular challenges are just part of being the mama of this spirited little person. And I wouldn’t trade anything–even the hours of peaceful uninterrupted sleep that I dream of–for that.
From a favorite poem, by Vilma McClure, in The Tao of Motherhood. It’s about infants, but I think it applies equally well to children of all ages.
Who, then, is the doer?
Is it the infant, who brings the mother through the veil of self-concern into limitlessness?
Is it the mother, who chooses to hold sacred her infant’s needs and surrender herself?
Or is it the One, which weaves them both through a spiraling path to wholeness?
Sweet dreams, everyone!
Self-inflicted haircut #3 October 28, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Family Life.Tags: bangs, haircut
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This one was pretty tame compared to the last two.
(that is a happy face, in case you can’t tell).
This self-cut was a specific attempt to style her hair. Although she decided some time ago that (like Maggie) she wanted to grow out her bangs, Anna was getting frustrated with them always falling in her face. So she decided to trim them.
The reason you can’t see them in the picture is because they are really, really short. As in about an inch long.
I admit, I had a shocked and dismayed reaction (my baby! her beautiful hair!), but honestly it doesn’t look that bad.
And when I was able to take the time to reflect, I realized that cutting her own hair is just so very Anna. I’m sure that in the future she’ll take scissors and hair dye and who knows what else to her hair. She’ll be experimenting with make-up and fashion and generally using her body as one of many canvases for self-expression. And my, oh, my–that girl certainly has a lot to express.
The writer at work, in her own time. October 27, 2009
Posted by threegirlpileup in Homeschooling, unschooling.Tags: writing
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Maggie, my early and enthusiastic reader, has been much slower to write. There are a combination of factors at play, I think. For one thing, her early reading seemed to thwart her rather than help her, since her ability to form written language was so far behind all her other language skills–and she knew it. She always resisted any kind of inventive spelling, and was frustrated with getting things “wrong.” And like many lefties, she has found the simple mechanics of holding and pencil and forming letters to be challenging. So while we’ve made some strides over the past months, Maggie has continued to feel like writing isn’t something that she’s good at. We’ve had some success with dictation, so she can focus on storytelling and leave the lettering to me, but my instinct has been that she could use some sort of support or push or encouragement that I wasn’t providing.
So, on something of a whim, I signed Maggie up for a writing workshop for homeschoolers. I wasn’t sure how it would work, but she was interested, so I thought it was worth a try. I had a promising conversation with the teacher, so I signed her up, set the alarm clock (!) and set out for the class on Monday morning.
Maggie emerged telling me that it was “awesome.” The teacher had given her some practical tips, like writing smaller and writing “messy,” i.e. not worrying about making beautiful letters. She was thrilled about her homework, and tackled it with abandon. Then she turned to the story she started yesterday, and began writing. And writing. And writing.
In the hammock…
In the chair…
and at the counter.
She spent literally hours bent over her notebook, working on her story. I had to drag her away from it to finally feed her some dinner at 7 p.m. She returned to it after bath, and her last waking activity was to read what she had written (the first chapter!) to her dad.
Sometimes, I am just astonished at how dense I am. At how hard it can be to trust that she will learn what she needs when she needs it. I admit it–I’ve been fretting more than a little about how to support my young writer. But when I was watching her tonight, poring over her story, I realized that we’ve already been down this path so many times. With swimming. With piano. Maggie really needs to come to things in her own time. Now, I admit that the timely support of adults has also been important, but I seem to have to learn over and over that given time and support, it really will all come together.
In fact, I blogged about almost exactly this same thing just about a year ago. Apparently it hasn’t quite sunk in yet. I guess Maggie’s not the only one who needs to come to things in her own time.
